Far be it from me to review yet another film about a viral outbreak and the resultant fallout but this happened to be in my DVD collection and being that I am still under collective house arrest I thought I'd give it a watch. Yes, DVDs, remember those? They're those weird plastic frisbee things we used to use to dispense visual entertainment before we started paying corporations to curate said visual entertainment for us on snazzy looking websites and almost immediately regretted it when they started making their own.
For sure I am not one to wallow in misery as it casts its shadow perched upon the bust of Pallas just above my chamber door. Perched and sitting and nothing more. Take thy beak from out my heart and take thy form from off my door!
Nonetheless here I am, and yet no misery casts its shadow here, as I am glad to announce that not only is the film 'Train to Busan' one of the best modern zombie flicks I've seen, it's nice to see that the Koreans of all people are making movies that people actually want to fucking see. There must be something about living in the shadow of a tin-pot communist regime that regularly threatens you with war that's a recipe for churning out badass fucking movies. I actually don't think I've seen a single Korean film in recent years I've disliked. Maybe 'The Wailing' but even then it was far from shit. I'll take it over 'Midsommar' any day, although I will admit I'd take an acid bath before watching that shitshow again.
Seriously though, what WAS that? It was like if you had Quentin Tarantino write 'The Wicker Man' with a brick lodged in his frontal lobe. If 'Hereditary' was the sex of a lifetime then 'Midsommar' was the subsequent AIDS diagnosis.
But anyways, enough negativity. Let's get on with the praise.
Seo Seok-Woo reluctantly gets on a train to Busan Metropolitan City to escort his young daughter Su-an to spend her birthday with her mother. As they make the journey, chaos abounds outside as riots and violence seem to spread with little indication as to the cause. When a wounded person enters the train and attacks some people, it becomes apparent that the zombie apocalypse has finally happened; and true to the law of sod, you're unarmed and on a fucking train instead of shut away in your hentai bunker.
One of my pet peeves, particularly when it comes to Western films, is the trope of the workaholic father. Not necessarily because it's over-played or not true to life, but mostly because of how they tend to be treated. That being with some level of contempt.
It's same in a lot of movies; a man works long hours in a shitty corporate job dealing with idiot shareholders, dull portfolios and now autists on Reddit; only to come home to an ungrateful wife and child who'll take just enough time out of the life of luxury their husband and father has built for them with his own two calloused and bleeding hands to tell him he's 'just not there', y'know?
Yes, Sharon, I'm not there. You know why? Because I'm at the office slaving my nuts off to keep the kids fed and you in fur-coats, jars of potpourri and canvases that say 'Live, Laugh, Love' on them. I'm up to my tits in spreadsheets and memes about 'stonks' so that you can go to the spa on the weekend with the girls; and Stevie, did you walk this dog? I told you, if you're gonna have the dog you're gonna fucking walk him, or Mister Sausage goes back to the shelter to meet Doctor Needle!
Point is that dads in movies, and in real life, get a lot of flack. It matters little what they do, society is always asking more of them and to top it all off they tend to get shafted and shit on from a great height. And it seems initially that 'Train to Busan' is playing to this trope. Fortunately it doesn't and through a fine performance from Gong Yoo as well as a terrific turn from child actress Kim Su-an, this film may be the most pro-dad movie since 'Sudden Death' starring Jean-Claude Van-Damme.
Early in the film Seok-Woo meets Sang-Wa, a tough bloke with a pregnant wife who initially treats Seok-Woo with some contempt given his profession as a Fund Manager. Eventually they're forced to team up, along with a young male athlete, to fight their way through a train filled with rage zombies to rescue their loved ones; and upon viewing these sequences my conclusion is that South Korean film-makers are weirdly good at filming action scenes on moving trains.
Speaking of the action, it fucking rules. I can get that it's sometimes difficult to merge genres like action with horror since part of the point of horror is often the helplessness one can feel in a situation that's beyond your control, but Train to Busan merges the two almost seamlessly. Again, I don't want to harp on it, but the scenes where the three men battle their way through gore-streaked train carriages with nothing but a baseball bat and their own fists are practical perfection. If there's any scene in a movie that requires a heavy metal soundtrack, it's that one.
Of course it's a zombie film, so where would we be without some ham-fisted social commentary; and here it comes in the form of Yon-Suk, the chief operations officer of the train company and believe me, he does fucking suck. He's one of the most cowardly and hateable characters to ever grace the screen and only becomes more of a contemptible shit as the film goes on. He manages to convince an entire train carriage full of people that our heroes are the dangerous ones due to the possibility that they may have become infected after bulldozing through hordes of the dead. Prescient considering the hysteria that's come about as a result of a certain other epidemic that shall remain nameless.
What's the definition of 'Insanity' again?
But this film's aim isn't social commentary. When it isn't putting hairs on your chest with testosterone fueled zombie skull crushing it's pulling you in with eminently likeable characters. Seok-Woo begins the film as an insensitive and emotionally distant father neglecting his child for a soulless career in finance who tends to put himself above others, to a determined warrior, fighting for his daughter's life. Sang-Wa, or as I like to call him, the Magnificent Butcher, is probably my favourite character, if not for his tough attitude then for his tendency to beat zombies with his bare fists.
What? You need a gun? What are you, some kind of fa...?
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| ...bulous individual? Hahaha, please don't arrest me. |
As already stated Kim Su-an, the actress that plays Seok-Woo's daughter, does a fine job, especially in a world where child actors can turn entire scenes into nails on a chalkboard. She begins somewhat stoic, although clearly miserable at the situation between her parents and her father's perceived indifference and selfishness. Later on however she acts up a storm, contributing to some genuinely heart-wrenching, if not a tad melodramatic, moments.
In a world where zombie flicks are so abundant they could be used as Venezuelan currency, Train to Busan stands out as a genuinely ass-kicking and emotional, well, ride, through a uniquely Asian zombie apocalypse.
Overall Quality - 4/5
If you're looking for a George Romero style satirical dark comedy then there's some of that, but this is more 'Night' and 'Day' than 'Dawn'. Focusing more on character and action than social commentary, to make use of an overused term, Train to Busan will in fact keep you on the edge of your seat. Character deaths are like a punch to the gut, even in moments where they don't make much sense, and small inconsistencies in the time it takes for someone to turn feral after being bitten are more than made up for by some excellent action direction. As such I'm very interested in checking out the animated prequel 'Seoul Station' and the recently released spiritual sequel 'Peninsula'.
Idiot Rating - 1/5
No idiocy here, just great action. Like any South Korean thriller it has its sense of humour, some of it coming from the character of the traumatized homeless man, who goes out like a boss anyway so he's not just a comic relief character in the long run.
This film was in my DVD collection for a good while and so when I put it on at the recommendation of some friends, I was delighted to find myself asking 'What the fuck was I waiting for?' Hopefully you'll think the same.
I'm DeadEye and go buy your dad a beer for putting up with you for this long. Some day he might save you in the zombie apocalypse.
